TWEETS THAT MAKE YOU THINK
karlameachem: To be irreplaceable, you must be different!
Jalapeno: Did you know… Take your bananas apart when you get home from the store. If you leave them connected at the stem, they ripen faster.
akaMonty: When your doctor keeps giving you advice on how to help your problem and you continually IGNORE it, I have zero sympathy for you.
AprilTara: Its amazing how much more I get done when I stay off of Twitter. Its losing its appeal. Quickly.
TWEETS THAT MAKE YOU LAUGH
athomemom: Is there ever a good reason to wake someone up just to ask if they are going to continue sleeping? I mean, really!
jodyreale: Soaking up the most serene, peaceful family dinner we’ve ever had. Tuesday, Sept. 16, 2008, I’ve been waiting for you.
Jalapeno: Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Jalapeno: Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing
techie_girl: Realized after lunch that I had been taking Tylenol Cold nighttime formular the entire day. No wonder I was so tired.
my3lilmonkeys: My 4 year old just came out of my room saying “Mama! Daddy! Your room is STILL MESSY!!! You need to clean it!” Taste of my own medicine.
mikedoe: I might be paranoid. Just Googled my grandma to make sure she’s not up to no good.
akaMonty: Fat’s a much better wrinkle-filler than botox. Also cheaper.
Patrysha: I will once again not start thinking about Christmas until December and do my shopping between the 20th and 23rd it’s tradition
jodyreale: I tell each day it’s my favorite, and then ask it to keep it a secret so that the others don’t get jealous. I’m clever that way.
jodyreale: If being distracted all the time is wrong, I don’t wanna…hey look! an ANT!
jodyreale: Considering forming an organization called the National Association of National Associations.
tupperwareclair: Ok, you made me want chocolate… and Johny Depp… maybe Johnny Depp covered in Chocolate!!! YUMMY!
wyndsong: I feel the same way :( maybe we should start a d-list community blog LOL! Like Kathy Griffins show
relocatedyank: The men in church like to tease me about my talkitiveness… I now have a name tag that simply says 1 cor 14:34. They think they r funny